Seasons Always Change
This post has been a long time coming, but it hasn’t felt quite right. I have edited it several times. I just wanted it to come out right.
I have always loved the changing seasons. I have always enjoyed sending one season out, and welcoming another in. I am not a fan of change, unless it is the change of seasons. I have not been as fond of the changes in my life.
The seasons of high school, college, getting my first teaching job, getting married, and on and on, have been happy, sad and everything in between.
Then came the season of infertility, which was a hard one. Then the season of our adoption journey, which was wonderful and trying all at the same time. When we became parents for the first time, we entered a crazy wonderful, sleep deprived season. We did that again with our second little one.
But amidst all the changing seasons of my life, this has been the wildest and the most beautiful.
Bryan got a new job and travels so often. I am left here with our two awesome boys who have doctors and therapies. I am still working as an adoption consultant, and have some other exciting things I am working on that take a good bit of time. I have never been so busy in all my life. I have had to choose gratitude so often when the exhaustion leads to bad attitudes. I miss my husband, being a single parent for at least a few days a week is exhausting. I get less sleep now than I did when I had newborn kids. But I am grateful, so grateful for the gifts the Lord has given during this time.
I appreciate so much how hard my husband works. I appreciate that he jumps right back into our life when he gets home without missing a beat. I love my kids ages- they are so fun, hilarious, and are good at being flexible when mommy is the only one here. I love that my friends check on me, bring dinner or coffee without me asking, come over just to chat and help. I love that though the weeks are hard, we keep our weekends as open as possible to soak up time together. Dex is in a wonderfully inclusive setting at school which he (and we) absolutely love!
Let me tell you why I think I can appreciate this season so much. The last season we were in was the season of saying no. We were fighting for Dex to move schools, Gus had lots of health things going on, work was busy, we couldn’t seem to find a routine, and so we had to say many nos. No to fun things, no to things that would be helpful; just lots and lots of nos. We felt as though we couldn’t take on one more thing, so we listened to the Lord’s nudges and said no.
I am so thankful we had that season before this one. Just like I am always so thankful to see fall come after a summer that is too hot. We were grown and stretched during that season, just as we are in this one. The older I get the more I am learning to recognize and appreciate the changing of seasons in my life.
So friends, if you find yourself in a tough season, or feeling like it will never end, just remember- seasons always change.