The Importance of Asking For Help
Continuing my series today with another very important lesson that I am continuing to learn.
I have a terrible habit of overcommitting myself and then trying to do it all without asking for help. I have always struggled with this. I don’t have a huge struggle with pleasing people, but letting people down is definitely something I don’t want to do. So get take it all on, get super stressed, and then take it out on my husband and kids. Not a great plan, right?
Now let me tell you something else, I say yes to things I know are important to me and that isn’t bad. I just don’t always know my limits. I have an amazing husband who travels a lot for work, I have two kids with Down syndrome (therapies and doctors appointments come along with my cuties), I work for Christian Adoption Consultants, I am Kids Director at my church, I write my blog, I am a founder of The Dream Retreat, and I have to keep my house clean. See, none of those are bad things, and I don’t want to give up anything- so I now practice two habits:
Don’t say yes to anything else right now, my plate is full
Ask for help
I have always felt like asking for help showed weakness. Then I listened to my friend, Mica May of May Designs, on The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey, and she made a statement about how asking for help is not showing a weakness at all. It is vital to being a productive woman.
So I decided then and there that I needed help. I want to give my family 100% and work, and blog, and find a little time to take a nap or read a book.
I wrote down all those things above and put them in order of importance. Of course my family was first then all the others came after. Then I asked myself, if my family was number one, what did I need to do in order to have enough energy and capacity to love them the best I could. I decided what that would look like for our family would be to have a nanny come two days a week. I knew I couldn’t be away from my kids everyday, and I wanted to be the main one caring for my kiddos- that is SO important to me. So that’s what we did. Our amazing nanny comes from 9-4, two days and week and in that time I run errands, write blog posts, work, have meetings, and clean the house.
This seemingly small thing has been life changing for me. I have gotten much better at asking for help with the little things as well. I ask Bryan if I need a minute, or if he can do bath time, or ask friends to help me when Bryan is out of town, etc. I no longer see asking for help as a negative.
I would encourage you to ask for help when and where you need it, friends. It makes a world of difference. You don't have to hire a nanny, but you may want to hire someone to help clean your house, or get a babysitter once a week, or even ask your husband to cook dinner one night a week. The beauty of asking for help is that we can ask for just what we need.
Until next time...